Joke 1:
Wife: "Our new neighbor always kisses his wife when he leaves for work. Why don't you do that?"
Husband: "How can I? I don't even know her."

Joke 2:
After being married for thirty years, a wife asked her husband to “describe her”.
He looked at her for a while … Then said, "You're A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K."
She asks … "What does that mean?"
He said, "Adorable, Beautiful, Cute, Delightful, Elegant, Foxy, Gorgeous, Hot."
She smiled happily and said … "Oh, that's so lovely … What about I, J, K?"
He said, "I'm Just Kidding!"

Joke 3:
Husband: Hi baby! Was missing you so I called..
Wife: Oh. What about the big fight we had 10 minutes ago? You not angry?
Husband: Oh Shit! I dialed home again.

Joke 4:
Husband: If I die, will you remarry? 
Wife: No! I'll stay with my sister. But if I die will you remarry? 
Husband: No, I'll also stay with your sister.

Joke 5:
Wife: If you keep losing your hair at this speed, I shall divorce you.
Husband: Oh my God! And I was stupid enough trying to save them!