English Jokes | Part - 12

 
Joke 1:
Patient: It's been one month since my last visit and I still feel miserable.
Doctor: Did you follow the instructions on the medicine I gave you?
Patient: I sure did. The bottle said, 'keep tightly closed.'

Joke 2:
Friend1: What did the confused egg say?
Friend2: I don't 'unda'-stand.

Joke 3:
Husband to wife: One month after I die I want you to marry Samy.
Wife: Samy! But he is your enemy!
Husband: Yes, I know that! I've suffered all these years so let him suffer now.

Joke 4:
Wife: Do you see that couple? How devoted they are? He kisses her every time they meet. Why don't you do that?
Husband: I would love to. But I don't know her well enough.

Joke 5:
Friend1: What did the half eaten naan say? 
Friend2: I wish I was 'puri'.

Joke 6:
Friend1: Why hurricanes were usually named after women?
Friend2: Because when they arrive, they're wet and wild, but when they go, they take your house and car.

Joke 7:
My husband and I divorced over religious differences.
He thought he was God and I didn't.

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